Turning It Around Fairly Quickly

Diabetes management isn’t a race or a one-shot deal. It’s an ongoing dance. For real. It’s not all-or-nothing. I truly benefit from grace and patience with myself. I am fully on my side! I want to feel good and control my blood sugar … and I want to have fun and pleasure with food too. I need to be able to eat “normally” at times – and I suppose I’m fortunate that I am able to do that on occasion without too many repercussions. It’s what I usually do that matters. And the dance goes on ….

When “Healthy” Foods Are No Longer Healthy Because of Diabetes

Here’s my problem: the joyful abandon with which I ate all of those “healthy” foods has come to a crashing halt due to diabetes. I can’t eat almost any of those foods anymore. Bananas, rice, potatoes (sweet or white), cereal, oats, etc. – all of them are bad for my blood sugar. Even legumes! My body doesn’t process them well anymore, which is really sad for me. I’m not wishing I could eat a donut. I’m wishing I could eat a sweet potato or a banana!

Stop Conflating Weight with Health, Particularly with Diabetes

Trigger/Content Warning: Discussion of harm of weight-loss dieting/focus, mention of calorie deprivation and psychological impacts. Look, I am not a doctor or nutritionist or in any form of medical care (please see my complete disclaimer at the end) – but as an observant human being with a brain, and a lifetime of my own lived

I Can’t Go Back, Much As I’d Like To

I’ve mostly adjusted to my new way of eating. I don’t make perfect choices all day long every day by any means, but I’m definitely making better choices most of the time. Every once in a while, I’ll try eating the “old way” – and I’ll quickly be reminded, even in just one meal, that I can’t. There’s no going back, no matter how good I’m feeling.

Freaking Out Doesn’t Help

I’m going to keep paying attention to what are the best choices for me in my daily life to stay well – physically, emotionally, mentally, psychologically – even spiritually. To me, it’s all tied together. Freaking out throws me off balance. Strict dietary programs and over-emphasis on activity throw me off balance. I’m riding the waves of recovery from decades of weight loss dieting traumas, negotiating new pathways in my relationship to food and health/well-being. I’m also learning on a deeper level what would have been very helpful for me to know when I was first diagnosed: I don’t have to go to extremes or get this under perfect control immediately – it is okay to take my time and find my way into balance.

Ignoring My Blood Sugar Is NOT An Option

This blog isn’t just about “success” in managing my blood sugar – it’s about the ups and downs, the struggles, and the ways I pull myself back up when I fall down. Which is where I am right now: down.

Allowing My Blood Sugar Level To Be “Good Enough”

My point of this post is to say that life happens – and that we don’t always have favorable conditions to manage our diabetes perfectly. In that case, we just do the best we can – and allow that to be good enough. I’ve tended in my life to be a perfectionist – but that isn’t sustainable – or practical or even ideal in a human life.

This Time Feels A Little More Challenging

When I was diagnosed with diabetes almost three years ago, I went into complete panic mode. My doctor just said it matter-of-factly, “you have diabetes” – and offered no further information other than I could start on medication to control it. No thank you! I didn’t receive any nutritional counseling (or for that matter, emotional counseling) from him regarding how to handle this diagnosis and my future health potentials. I was left to figure it out on my own.

Figuring Out A Weight Neutral Diabetes Program

So, this dance with diabetes continues for me. It’s not all smooth and easy – and I am far from perfect at it. I’m still figuring out the balance, but I feel hopeful. I know that I have some leeway – I just need to be mindful of how far from the original program I stray. It took many months of being pretty careless before I really paid the price. It’s daily decisions that add up over time, not every single meal. I know this – now I just have to do it – in a way that supports my emotional and mental health as well as my physical health.